disheartened

I am starting to feel very disheartened about this whole adoption thing, it's taking forever to actually even take steps in the forward direction. I do have my fingers crossed that Thursday brings everything to us that we want to hear, and will give us the step forward that we both want... but part of me has this dread that it won't and that we will have no options at all and adoption will be ruled out for us just like everything else.

I think the photo pretty much sums up how I feel, I know Hubby is being amazing and is keeping me going in a positive way and supporting me however I think we both feel like we are under water and slowly drowning in fear of us not having a family...

I think today has been pretty bad, possibly because I've been at the nursery and spent time with the wonderful kids there.. We were baking valentines cakes and playing with pink sparkly playdough.. hehe very fun.. Although mine really didn't look as good as the photo... wish it had but maybe next time it will... 

Haven't done a whole lot else, off to Brownies this evening and then home to play D&D and eat pancakes =D